Tuesday, 4 June 2013

Give the guy a break!

I was listening to the radio in the car today.  The hosts were talking to a woman about how "romantic" certain things were.  Apparently they had recently encouraged guys to go out and buy their partners flowers, and hope that the girls hadn't heard the suggestion on the radio.

The woman the hosts were speaking to had written in because she had heard the suggestion on the radio.  In her opinion, the flowers weren't "romantic" enough.

To add insult to injury, the flowers were "the ones on special from a Coles Express or a petrol station" - the ones with the clear cellophane wrapping that might have been sitting there for a day too long.

So, because the guy hadn't come up with the idea himself, and because the flowers weren't "up to standard", the girl wasn't happy and complained to the radio station hosts.


Are you serious????

Your partner was reminded by a couple of strangers that you are worth buying flowers for.  He then drove somewhere, where he knew there would be flowers, and paid good money for them.  But that's not "romantic"???


Girls!  Let's get this straight.

If your guy needs to be reminded to buy you flowers, that's okay.

If he has to put a reminder in his phone or his diary, that's okay.  In fact, that's great!  Don't you realise that the things he doesn't want to forget are put in his phone or diary?  Therefore, if giving you flowers is in there, you're important to him!

This might come as a shock to you, but guys are different from girls.  Generally speaking, flowers are not important to them.  And if their love language isn't gifts, or if they don't know that yours is, it's even harder for them.

Give the poor guy a break, and appreciate that he has taken effort to show you that he loves you and that he hopes you'll appreciate the effort and the thought (even if someone else's thought needed to kick-start his thought).

And while we're on the subject of giving your partner a break, let me continue my soap-box rant!

Why do we think that our partner has to "pay" for things?  And no, I'm not talking about money.

He doesn't take the rubbish out so she refuses to kiss him.

She doesn't let him watch the footy, so he's arrogant and rude.

He watches TV while eating a dinner that she's put extra effort into making.

She spends all night on Facebook, going to bed long after he's asleep.

It really bothers me when people refuse, first of all, to enunciate their wishes, and secondly to be polite to (at least in theory) the most important person in their lives.

Your partner is the person you've chosen to be with!  You love them!  Why on earth would you speak rudely to them???  Just because they love you?  That doesn't make sense!  Surely they should be the person you try most hard to please, to meet their needs, to make their lives as good as possible!

And they love you, right?  So surely asking them (politely) to do something for you isn't a big deal.

I know.  My head is in a world of relationship utopia.  All is love and rainbows and fairytales.


The world is not perfect.  And relationships can be really hard.

But surely it's worth the effort!  Surely a bit of respect, politeness and, at the very least, civility is worth the effort with the one you love!  Isn't it better than letting your relationship unwind in a long string of unspoken desires, harsh words, neglect and despair?

I really, honestly think it is.

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