Tuesday, 29 September 2015

Counting down

We're on the final countdown folks!  We settle on our new house in 8 sleeps, and we'll be moving in 3 sleeps later!

I was talking to my parents (mostly Mum) this evening.  They've just returned from a few weeks in Vietnam, including riding motorbikes in their crazy traffic!  It sounds like they had an absolutely awesome trip, ate some ridiculously lovely food, and came home with a new view on some things about life, which is always a good souvenir to bring home.

Mum was asking how the stress levels are going with the move, and I honestly got to tell her that it's been great!

I got to have a 4-day weekend this one just past, and on the first day the Big Fella and I did some packing and cleaning together.  He got to clean the oven (God, I love that man!!!!) while I scrubbed the oven racks.

We got about half way through the day and wondered what else we could do because everything we thought of can't really be done until next weekend.  We've sorted through everything and gotten rid of plenty of stuff, we've packed pretty much all the things we won't need for the next two weeks, and the big cleaning jobs are done.

The stress of the practical stuff of buying a house is pretty much done.  We still need to inspect the house prior to settlement, and the money needs to actually change hands, but it's all going smoothly.

The last two house moves I did mostly without the Big Fella (he was already in our new locales), so having him here to take some of the load has been brilliant!  And the fact that our houses are only 15 minutes apart helps relieve the stress because, if I need to (though I won't want to), I can come back to this house to finish cleaning.

So, at this point I'm feeling pretty relaxed.  No doubt that will change several times between now and when we're fully moved, but for now it's great!

On another note, I am feeling so incredibly blessed lately!  When I first became a mother, I honestly hated it.  When people said that the days go so quickly and you'll turn around and they'll be adults, I always smiled politely and internally imagined beating them over the head with a baseball bat.  The days seemed to go on forever!!!

But at this point in our lives, even though the Little Big Fella still drives me nuts sometimes, he also makes my heart melt regularly.  He is so sweet and funny and interesting!

He was telling me a story this morning, making up a tale about an alien and his brother, and a voice that came from nowhere.  It went on forever in a completely rambling fashion, but I marveled at the way his brain works at the moment, and how much he's grown, and how clever he is!

And on the weekend he drew me a picture on his whiteboard and wrote me a note saying how I have been the best mum in the world to him.

Tonight I was reading to him and, as he was falling asleep I realised that I am so lucky to be his Mum.  I am lucky to have this precious life entrusted to me, with all of the difficulties and worries and frustrations.  I get to have this wonderful little boy who absolutely adores me, even when my "tummy looks like it has a baby in it", even when I blow up in frustration or don't want to do the things he wants to do.  He still adores me and thinks I'm the best mum in the world to him.

What an absolutely priceless gift that is!

Monday, 14 September 2015

A good day

Today was a good day.

I woke when I was ready, which is always the best way to wake.

The Big Fella was at work so I made the most of my highest energy time of day and packed a few boxes, put some washing on, made breakfast for the Little Big Fella and myself, cleaned up the kitchen and got myself ready to go to a friend's Tupperware party (including painting my toenails).

I bought a new dress last week that arrived in the mail on Thursday.  When I tried it on, I felt pretty... until I looked in the mirror.  In the mirror, all I could see was a bigger middle than I want.

I tossed up whether to keep that dress for a couple of hours.

I ended up deciding that it was such a lovely dress and I wanted to wear it.  I wanted to be brave enough to wear something because it was pretty, even though I felt somewhat self-conscious in it.

I wanted to let go of the notion that I must continue to be my skinny twenty-something self.  Instead I want to embrace my not-so-skinny now self, who is beautiful in many ways, even if it's not physically in the way I was before.

So I wore this dress to my friend's today.  I was a bit over-dressed, and a bit self-conscious, but I didn't look in the mirror before I left, I did my hair nicely and I felt pretty.  

It was great to catch up with a couple of friends, have a chat, a laugh, and eat some delicious food.  The kids mostly got along really well, which allowed us to relax and enjoy the time together.  Somewhat unusually, the couple of little scuffles didn't involve the Little Big Fella at all!  

We hung around for ages because the kids were playing so well!  It may have been close to four hours that we were there!  Well, that's what the clock says anyway.  It only felt like one, or maybe two.  As they say, time flies when you're having fun!

When we got home the Big Fella was sleeping so we quietly went about having a very belated lunch/afternoon tea.  I hung out some more washing and moved my packed boxes to the pile downstairs.

The Big Fella had woken up, but wasn't really awake at all.  And the Little Big Fella was re-watching a cartoon he's seen at least half a dozen times this weekend (sometimes I love Netflix, sometimes not so much!).  So I grabbed the Little Big Fella and we went into his room and packed his books.

He was gorgeous!  We went through the books and picked out about a third of them that he didn't want to keep anymore.  We packed the rest (and a couple that I don't want to get rid of because of the huge role they've previously played in our lives) and he taped the boxes up and wrote on them.

Then we decided we were on a roll, so we went through his toys (which were disorganised after a couple of playdates over the past few weeks anyway).  He decided to add a bunch of toys to the giveaway pile, many of which surprised me.  We went downstairs and grabbed a box to pack all of the books and toys in and he wrote on the box, "D's giveaway box of toys and books".

I've left the box in his room, just in case some of the "giveaway" toys turn out to be "keep" toys, but we think we're going to give them to his school and the hospital, if they want them.

After a little bit of mucking around, it was time to let the chooks out and take the washing off the line.  The Little Big Fella decided he wanted to help with the washing, which we've not done before - partly because he's too short, and partly because I fold the washing as it comes off the line so that the basket doesn't sit on the lounge for the next week.

But we dragged a chair over and he took the clothes off and we laid them flat in the basket.  The basket is currently sitting on the lounge and will possibly be there for the next few days :-)

The Big Fella decided that he wanted to go to the next town and get some drinks for the evening, so the Fellas took off and I set the sprinklers up and went upstairs to check a couple of things online and get a start on the side for the pork roast (the Big Fella had already put it in the oven earlier).

I put the chooks away, filled their food and water and opened the gate just as the Fellas got back.

We finished preparing dinner and ate it watching Rango (on a school night!).  Then my best friend called and we chatted for a good while, mostly about the good stuff in life.

The Big Fella and I watched the end of Part I in a mini-series about Peter Allen then went to bed and chatted for ages.

Now it's after midnight and I'm thinking this day pretty much couldn't have been better.  Unless my family were here.  That's about all that could have been better.

The weather was beautiful.
I had enough sleep.
I achieved plenty.
My son was almost angelic!
I got to catch up with friends.
I ate delicious food.
I got to wear a pretty dress.
I got to spend good time with my husband.

That looks like a recipe for a very good day.  Now repeat that as often as possible for a VERY good life!

Wednesday, 9 September 2015

The nuggets were good...

Dinner in our house is normally a fairly quick, quiet event.  We eat at the dining table, turn the TV off, and have quiet conversation.

But every now and then I am reminded that I live with boys.

Tonight was one of those dinner times!

The Big Fella had cooked up a salmon fillet for each of us adults, and some chicken nuggets for the Little Big Fella.  I'd made a nice big bowl of salad and the Little Big Fella had set the table.

We sat down together and began our meal, talking about our day and whatever else came up.

Then the Little Big Fella offered his dad one of his chicken nuggets.

Who knows what the Big Fella was thinking, but he shoved it in his mouth then decided that he needed sauce with it.  He grabbed the bottle of squeezy tomato sauce, tipped his head back, opened wide and squeezed!

The Little Big Fella couldn't believe what he was seeing!  I could literally hear his brain cogs turning in an attempt to understand what was happening.

Unfortunately for the Big Fella, he squeezed the sauce straight onto the nugget, so couldn't actually tell how much sauce he had in his mouth.

It was a lot!

The squeeze finished, he had a few chews and then registered how much sauce there was.

By this time, the Little Big Fella's brain had decided that what he was watching was highly amusing, and he was giggling away.

The Big Fella started making a face but bravely chewed his way through the nugget, commenting that "the nugget was good, but the sauce was a bit much"!

Cue the copy cat!

The Big Fella suggests that the Little Big Fella has a go.  There is enthusiastic agreement and in goes a large piece of chicken nugget, back goes the head...

The Big Fella grabs the sauce bottle, tips it up and starts to squeeze...

Which is when the Little Big Fella realises that he like sauce, but not that much!  He moves his head to the side to stop the flow of sauce...

And there we have sauce filling up his mouth, all over his face, down his neck and all over his school shirt.

We had a good, long, loud laugh and enjoyed the change of pace in our dinner routine.

Wednesday, 2 September 2015


I'm exhausted.

I go to bed early and lay there, thinking of nothing and everything.  I try not to think about the fact that I'm not asleep because that will cause me to stress that I am not asleep, which will stop me from sleeping.

I toss and turn.  I do not sleep.

Giving up, I get out of bed and do little things around the house or try to lull myself to sleepiness with a puzzle game on my phone or tablet in the dark.

It is late.

I know I will be tired again tomorrow and yet I still cannot sleep.

Eventually I am shattered and fall into bed again, nodding straight off.

The alarm wakes me well before I am ready.

Repeat for several days.  My temper gets shorter and positivity declines.  I am uninspired, and overwhelmed by the things that need to be done.

After three of four nights I am tired enough to collapse and sleep as soon as I go to bed.  Then the pattern returns.

When did I forget how to go to sleep?

I've never been one to go straight to sleep when I go to bed.  I remember when I first married the Big Fella, I was absolutely flabbergasted that anyone could go to sleep so quickly!

But half an hour, give or take, used to be my standard.  I'd lay in bed thinking of the day that had been, the days that were coming, my plans, my hopes, my wonderings about life.  And then I would drift off to sleep.

But the pattern has changed and I don't know how to change it back.

I think having the TV off in the evening helps.  I really enjoy the quiet, especially after reading to the Little Big Fella, and once he is asleep.

I like to have time to calm down.  There has been so much going on lately, not only with our house but at work and in general.  I can be so wired to get things done, or just ruminating on the day, and having quiet for while before bed helps me let it all go.

I like to sit and enjoy my home, but when there is "stuff" everywhere, and things are out of place, I find it difficult to relax.

My sister sent me "Millie Marotta's Animal Kingdom" for my birthday.  I've had a few evenings where I've enjoyed doing a little colouring.  It's a nice alternative to reading, which sometimes gets me so engrossed in the story that I forget to go to bed!

Well, I need to go and finish the dishes so that I can go to bed and attempt some sleep.  Wishing you all sweet dreams and restful sleep tonight.